A confession

I was staying in my Aunt’s house last tuesday when my niece (8 years old) came and offered me a magazine. It was a Total Girl special issue on embarrassing stories of children and teenagers across the globe. Most of the girls wrote about how they act stupid whenever their crushes are around. In the back of my head, I was wondering about my own silly performance in front of the guys I like.

As I was browsing through the pages, I saw Kelly Clarkson’s confession…here it goes: “Like every other girl in the world, my most embarrassing moment had to do with a guy completely turning me down.”

A smile painted on my face after repeatedly reading Kelly’s statement. What this post of mine is all about? Well, it is about a girl, standing side by side of boy asking him to be her promdate.

Note: it took me a year to think about how would I do such an embarrassing thing…I saved up all my courage and spent it all in a 30-seconder conversation with my four-year crush.

Let us just call him Orange (He’s not like the Annoying Orange in YOUTUBE, he just wears orange shirt most of the time.

Orange and I were former dorm mates back when we’re still freshmen. He is so timid and having a blank reaction is his identifier.

He looks so fragile yet very mysterious. Seldom you’ll see him with a girl but you can see him alone most of the time. He was just a typical teenager with extraordinary fair skin. But it was his eyes that I liked the most.

I never had a chance to be his classmate in any of my general courses. So I’m just like a mere stalker of him…always watching him from a far and hoping that one day, I’ll be able to be with him, not in a romantic way (as a friend of course).

So for almost four years, I’ve waited and planned on how I can actually talk to him or even just go near him…even if it is just a foot or two. When I reached my senior year, that’s when I’ve decided to come and get him as my promdate. Spending this event with him would be epic…but in my quest for a perfect date, it was indeed epic; EPIC FAILED!

Why? I asked his friend, also a good friend of mine to serve as a catalyst. However, it didn’t turn out just like in movies.

I was on my way to my class when I saw Orange, and I thought that was an opening. A chance! I said to myself while my feet were shaking and my hands were ready to cover my face just in case I’ll be embarrassed.
As both of us were heading to the same direction, I utter the words I’ve been practicing for three years.

*Conversation
Me: Umm Orange did he tell you about prom?
Orange: Yes, he did.
Me: Is it okay with you?
Orange: Ummm..I don’t know…because..I don’t know…Ummm
Me: It is all right with me. don’t worry.
Orange: Umm..because..Umm I don’t know
Me: I said it is all right if you don’t want too. Thanks by the way (Forced smile)
Orange: Okay

See, that was my dream come true conversation as in one on one conversation with my longtime crush. as you can see, he only knew few phrases and he spoke them repeatedly. At first I was like, “WTF? How could you not say it directly. Just say NO and it will be a good answer. Something I’ve been expecting” But after I went to the restroom with my teary-eyes, I realized, he did that in order to protect me from being hurt. If I were in his case too I’ll probably think of a less hurting way of turning down someone. Especially if that someone is just a person whom I seldom see but never spoke to.

Lesson learned. Never assume that no matter how prepared you are to do something, the outcome is still unpredictable. In reality, every action taken bears a lot of consequences. It is unlike in movies that you always get what you wanted. It is unlike in movies that your crush will say Yes in an instant. It is unlike in movies that you’ll get to experience happiness easily.

Life, unlike in movies is a little bit complicated when you think so…but its simplicity lies on the one who’s running it:)

When will kids be kids again?

I may not be rich when it comes to money, but I do believe I have lived my childhood just like a kid. I’ve cut enough leaves to make as cooking ingredient. I’ve run several times around the town’s plaza. I’ve gotten a number of bruises and scars all around my tiny body. I’ve been scolded so many times for going home late. I’ve cried more than I think I could because I did not win when we were playing jackstone. I made quite enough friends but a lot of enemies…see? the beauty of being a kid. When honesty was your only weapon, and candies were your only motivation…who would have thought life could be so simple and less expensive back then?

Now, kids are almost grown ups. They enjoy technology and do things that seemed to be not suitable for their early age. Gone are the days of playing outdoor games. No more running and playing hide and seek… Today, almost all of them enjoys talking to nobody just sitting at the corner with their PSP (and it is freakin’ expensive)

However not all kids are enjoying that kind of luxury. There are others who do not have time for themselves. Do not have weekend plans…and even birthday celebration. There kids who think more than an adult do. They are burdened by the fact that they must go into the streets in order to eat at least a meal a day…wuld you even call it a meal if it is just a water and a bread?

I’m always saddened by the fact that these children have skipped from a mere infant turned into a man in a boy’s body. I don’t blame anyone for their situation but if all of us would just give them the chance to be kids again, they could have been saved. How come we people can afford to buy laptops, cellular phones, shoes, bags and cars that would even cost a fortune but always hesitates to give these poor angles a piece of bread? What hurts me more is that even children now know how to criticize and discriminate other children.

My sister and I were eating at a fast food restaurant when I suddenly heard to young boys at the age of six or seven I guess. They were complaining that the smell of the playhouse stinks…and there were two boys not fully clothed just smiling and standing as all of the people watched them. The two young rich kids were yelling for the guard’s attention. The way they treat the street children, the way they try to humiliate them as if they were criminals. I even heard one of the rich kids saying that when they grow up and be a policeman they will put those kids in jail.

I really wanted to scold them, but their parents were there. As for the two street children, they kept on smiling just to avoid conflict and to hide the pain they felt the moment they were scrutinized.

After that incident, I was really troubled. I knew how kids were raised these days but I did not expect that they could that be brutal and heartless. I was lucky to be born earlier than they were. I do not care if I was not born with the amazing lifestyle technology brings. I am proud to be born during the transition period. At least I got to experience the primitive way of life. I got to have a glimpse on the traditions that made me who I am now. I may not be “techno kid” but at least I know that I do not have a robotic heart.

When I get to have a family of my own, I will surely not make the same mistakes parents of today’s generation made. I will not spoil them with material things nor let them wander in the streets.

Why not let your kids be kids again?

What I like about “Dear Miss Manners”

After almost four years of visiting the library and just staring at this encyclopedic like book, I finally got to open it and read its content…Just the first few pages of course since I got classes to attend.

The book which I find interesting is about how people should act with etiquette even in the most unexpected situation. Dear Miss Manners gives the readers the simplest solution in dealing with day-to-day problems with confidence and grace.

As I was reading, here are the quotable lines which I really like…

“If one does the right thing, one does not have to read nasty little books about how to deal with guilt”

“You wouldn’t trust a preacher who never experienced the temptation of sin”

“Who says there is a right way of doing things and a wrong?”

“Two wrongs make a blight”

“We now have a world full of new, improved people who are really ready to move on to improving others. This had better stop before there are no good people left”

“Most people can be trusted to behave personally well when they are in love and perfectly dreadfully when they have been dumped”

“Magazines are full of suggestions to help one fool people about one’s identity”

and the one that struck me most is…..

‎”The bride’s wish that the wedding be “the happiest day of her life” came true. Each succeeding day was slightly less happy than one before, finally they divorced.”

Pictures don’t LIE , this time

 

Bodies were dumped like piles of garbage. Women and children crying to death upon the sight of what they have lost. Men try to use all the remaining parts of their broken body, mind and home.

Seeing the picture of the victims of the earthquake in Haiti made me ask myself, if I was there and one of them, would I still want to continue  living?

The pictures were vivid. They showed how the 7.0Mw earthquake killed more than 150,000 people and destroyed the lives of the rest in a matter of days.  Almost 400,000 were homeless. They all depend on the aid the United Nations and other countries offer them.

I may not be from Haiti, but I know how it feels to be part of just a “dot” on the globe. No one really seems to care on what happened, it is just they are obliged to extend their help.

If one continue to browse for more pictures about the devastating incident, one can see more troubled faces. Everyone is in despair with nothing to hold on to but themselves. The bruises on their body will  leave scars that even time cannot heal.

The younger ones  who should be enjoying their childhood definitely were put into a situation where they could not even think about their dreams and ambitions. They were trapped in  the present where everything seemed to be the end of their happiness.

 

Tears and blood were shed with one strike of nature. A natural phenomenon that one can only predict but could not stop. Who would want this to happen to our fellowmen? It is quite ironic that the ones who are not capable of saving themselves from the demand of the society and the global industry are the ones out in a situation that only made them feel smaller than before. I am not saying the scenario could have been better if it happened on the first world countries, but it is just too unfair for the people of Haiti. They are already poor in terms of economy, and now they are burdened with a bigger problem.